I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Look Back.
The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an iconic tough guy. However, at the height of his cinematic dominance in the eighties and nineties, he also delivered several surprisingly great comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this December.
The Role and The Famous Scene
In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a undercover cop who poses as a elementary educator to track down a criminal. For much of the movie, the crime storyline functions as a basic structure for Arnold to film humorous moments with his young class. Arguably the most famous belongs to a student named Joseph, who spontaneously rises and informs the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger deadpans, “Thank you for that information.”
That iconic child was brought to life by youth performer Miko Hughes. Beyond this role included a character arc on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the famous sisters and the haunting part of the youngster who comes back in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with multiple films listed on his IMDb. Furthermore, he is a regular on popular culture events. He recently shared his experiences from the production 35 years later.
A Young Actor's Perspective
Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?
Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.
That's remarkable, I can't remember being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?
Yeah, a little bit. They're flashes. They're like mental photographs.
Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?
My mother, mainly would accompany me to auditions. Frequently it was like a cattle call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all patiently queue, go into the room, be in there for a very short time, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.
Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?
He was incredibly nice. He was enjoyable. He was nice, which I guess isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a good work environment. He was great to work with.
“It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”
I knew he was a major movie star because I was told, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he wasn't scary to me. He was merely entertaining and I was eager to interact with him when he wasn't busy. He was working hard, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd flex and we'd be dangling there. He was incredibly giving. He purchased for each child in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was a major status symbol. This was the must-have gadget, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It finally gave out. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.
Do you remember your days on set as being fun?
You know, it's funny, that movie was this cultural thing. It was such a big movie, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the direction of Ivan Reitman, the location shoot, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a finitely child at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would bring me their Game Boys to pass certain levels on games because I was able to, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all little kid memories.
The Infamous Moment
OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember the context? Did you grasp the meaning?
At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word taboo meant, but I knew it was provocative and it made adults laugh. I understood it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given an exception in this case because it was comedic.
“It was a difficult decision for her.”
How it originated, from what I understand, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Certain bits of dialogue were written into the script, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Let me think about it, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she was hesitant, but she believed it will probably be one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.
